Thank you

Friday, October 29, 2010 by B.H.
Oftentimes, I really wish, life could be as easy as the table of 2. I remember when I was kid, how blithely I would sing, ‘two ones are two –, two twos are four’ and so on with a marvelous feeling that something on the face of the earth –– could be this much easy. But, it’s not the table of 2 –– it’s life.

Everyone face bruises, don’t you? [I want you to nod your approval here so that I might feel a bit sane] because I hear humans do. Martians do too, just look at me [=P].

Everyone build ‘castles-of-sand’ and only sometimes they don’t crumple.

You’ll see strange and yet usual affairs here, sometimes you’ll find a bird who wouldn’t fly out of an opened cage, you’ll meet people with solid masks on their faces –– disguised just to go with the flow, who wouldn’t even look like humans, you’ll see unicorns in your villages jumping in the ponds too, okay that’s a bit farfetched.


I wanted to say,

You can at times end up doing stupid things when your ‘castle-of-sand’ crumples. I mean that is legal, right?

I know some people are cursing me secretly – for the recent good (not really) deed I’ve made my angels record in my ‘amal nama’ by deactivating my twitter account, which I regret, really.

And today I feel obliged to thank some special visitors of My Time Capsule for making me feel ‘something-really-good’ throughout the whole lifetime of this place up till now.

And I intend no pun!


She’s simple yet the most beautiful human being on the planet Earth and Jupiter (according to her), the regular and [lol] loyal reader =P of my pathetic Time Capsule. And yes! She’s always there for the advisory business. *whispers* She thinks she knows everything, and um, I think the same…….almost. You don’t mind, do you? Of course you don’t. Thank you Princess for your nonstop feedback. =)

My first ever fan, not only because she is my best friend (She said that =P), the first ever non-bot comment on MTC was hers. She thinks she is going to be the president of this country, and she also thinks I am a good poet, tell me about it. I believe you'll read it someday. So, thank you so much for being the first ever genuine visitor.

It always snows when she is around, not literally though and yes! She is cooler than me and every one of you who is reading this post or not. Thank you Tazeen! =) And I’m sorry, I will find a better nickname for you, ‘cause I think fat cat sounds kind of outdated, 'and you see, I’m not that rancorous'. I tried reading whole Wuthering Heights just to know about Mr. Heathcliff. [=P] But for some reason I gave up after reading 25% of the book. So, Tazeen, thanks a lot. =)


She is older than me but she somehow reminds me of my childhood. Anyway, the coolest nerd I’ve ever seen, the fickle thing with the blog of same nature as hers. And I think she can take over this country. Xehra, thank you so much –– for so many praises, for the post in which you recommended my page with a rib-tickling cartoon in green shirt who was supposed to be me –– attached to it and for the advice regarding writing an English Text Book –– for preschoolers. =) Thank you. =)


The guy I used to hate caboodles turned out to be the direct opposite of what –my perception about him was, surprisingly, I was wrong – totally. This person always thinks about others’ happiness for no reason. 2nd best person I’ve ever seen. And good thing, he likes my Time Capsule, he once told me… No seriously, he likes it, ask him. He’s just like my brother, a bit insane one though. He can always ‘screw’ people just to amuse them, trust me.


And thanking all the people who have ever visited this Time Capsule of mine! =) (only if you don’t know me personally).

P.S: I’m sorry.

Wake-Up Call

Wednesday, October 27, 2010 by B.H.

I like how a lavender-crimson-red evening swirls away ––
Like that kite in folly –– eludes with the gale
Out of the reach – it floats – just as hope… so far
Like that only dainty pearl –– a whole star
As bumpy as a tarn, as prim as a skylark,
Sparking in the heavens as a solitary mark

I carved a heart in the wood – where I had come
And carved your name which shone like the sun
To my gratification, I ran my hands on it
Until night –– till the scar got imprinted

And now I behold the sky in evenfall,
It’s blurred…
I flapped my hand before the eyeball,
I rubbed…
But mayhap some stars in the whole sky––
Are too shallow for the reach of my sight…

–– B.H.

Till the words don't rhyme

Thursday, October 21, 2010 by B.H.

Smiling passively at the film of haunting past –– flashing in your mind before your eyes –– is the strangest thing in this world and yet it is the most beautiful. *smiles* as stunning as that illusive existence that erupts into reality right before your very eyes –– and flares an unendurable craving for a desire to be gratified. Only if we were not the two alike poles of a magnet –– in love but –– only to follow rites –– the universal law –– they repel each other.

Every time I feel at sea, I fall off…

Enough fallings off the edges... I should step back this time, step back and walk backwards towards the haunt and get overwhelmed with choler and grapple with the phantoms… claw their throats until they suffocate and burst into tears –– tears of painfulness and impuissance and finally batter them to death. I should walk backwards to make it to you…

Enough of our private theories… I’ve started thinking a lot. *smiles*

Something About Me

Wednesday, October 20, 2010 by B.H.
Things I wish to do but won’t:

To shriek my lungs out amid a decent crowd
To dance in the middle of the street without caring (once done)
To take my shirt off in the summer rain
To get away from the café without paying (twice done)
To travel in an unknown bus –– oblivious to the destination



Things I don’t wish to do but I do:

To go to the college of commerce
To follow the rites and stay ordinary
To share room with my brother
To get sad/hurt just because of the least hurtful things
To prefer silence in my defense and in anger



Things I like and love:

Poetry/ mysteries/ riddles/ fog/ some songs, blah and blah
To stand like a beacon amongst others
To respect the people who really deserve
To write abstractly that none gets except for few
To like people secretly



Things I loathe and hate:

Hangouts with family
To attend formal meetings, wedding ceremonies and dinners at expensive restaurants
To get humiliated (I’m naturally sensitive *blinks innocently*)
Winters and cold nights
Heavy metal music and specially the band My Chemical Romance


Jeez! =/

Solace

Monday, October 18, 2010 by B.H.


They sat by the lake – secluded yet together
Along with the torn letter’s pieces to smother
And then Autumn passed by –– And He took it all away…!
“Their secret’s been revealed –– Yet they have told no other”

I give up before I even think about starting it. Such diffidence – I have not experienced.

There’s so much in grate to combust for –– that can lighten up the whole series of the darkest nights.

But still, there’s an invisible push –– the lethal weight pressing down on me like a rotten society’s slants that keeps one low –– low as a thrall, grasps one by one’s wings, plucks its feathers oftentimes and –– keeps one low, in the dwelling –– from flying.
The hands, –– as transparent as water, as mighty as a lion, as keen as an owl, as nimble as a deer, press me downwards in a hallow hole –– in an abyss so deep that it takes centuries to fall and once I fall painlessly, it presses down on me even more inside the shallow rubbles until I penetrate them and get swallowed up by the abyss and eventually forget –– everything I once remembered.



I’m done with hoping, I’m done with dreaming, I’m done with trying.
Let’s pretend now. “Look what I’ve found… A raw hope – a wingless bird!”
Let’s walk with it – till we part.
And because, it feels good… Somehow, it makes me want to walk. Somehow… someway, I like to walk, when I’m with you.

Such lonely lives in togetherness! Tsk! Tsk! Tsk!
And ultimately the push will say: “Cull the no-hopers from the herd!”

Help. Solace. Oh God. The push is mightier.
Aghast!

The Art of Forgetting

Friday, October 8, 2010 by B.H.

It has been days and days –– this daze –– I’m faced with and yet I am not able to aerify this solider-than-rock, more saturated than pain –– pain of burning skin state. The question that my braincase eludes in response to my question is that what the question is. Maybe it is sometimes futile to ask this scummy organ.

It seems I’ve lost something, my sun, my winter sun, the beautiful sun, the only sun. Every single glorious vision from my mind as if –– have perched away.

It’s like an infant thought with no unity in ideas, just swinging strands, a fabric woven by an amateur, like an abstraction.

I lost my fantasies –– my fantasies with you –– which were ineffable. Dreams that we wove together, the reason – we woolgathered for. We kept on weaving ruby dreams side by side, shoulder to shoulder in perfections. The dewy green grass of a glimmering morning –– that needs bare feet to feel alive, we walked on it and had a talk about dewdrops on lilies, remember? –– it seems blurry and misty now. The relief –– that slows my pulse down after the racing as if I may have seen life without you, I lost. It races now –– as if it has been challenged to race, and at times it slows down to zero.

We are all strong that’s why we are surviving.

Let me forget and survive.

I vivified you with my eyes closed and brought you as close to me as I could, and faced you, faced the blastoffs (pleasant and unpleasant) you had in store, you did everything you could, and then I pushed you away with the palms of my both hands, as far as I could with all the power I had, and transformed you into logs. I transformed you into everything –– deserted. Memory destroyed.

I have forgotten.

Brain? Check!
Senses? Check!
Reasons? Check!
Health? Check!
Goals? Check!
Wit? Check!
Dreams? Uncheck!

*takes a deep breath*

Ah, I can inhale the oxygen now. Good, I can breathe. I guess I’m okay now. =)

Unnamed

by B.H.


Phool rangeen
Sarkain sunsaan
Mizaaj sangeen
Udaasiyo ki shaam
Mujhe main samaye
Aur main naadaan
Aur pagal. Bus pagal.

Moral

Sunday, October 3, 2010 by B.H.

Lord can do anything – and He does it adeptly for our own good. Lord loves His – mankind seventy times more than a mother loves her children.

Let the hope not nestle low with the broken ruby wings for He is invariably and perpetually with you. We might dislike at times – the ways He chooses for us to pass through the tracts of life – but if we keep faith then the harvesting turns out fruitfully good – eventually.

Just heed to what He says to you –– what He wants you to do –– how He wants you to do.


Sometimes there can be no reason to smile, but smile…
For you have –
Another sun to see, a new day to look forward to…
How ill-disobedient you become when you think you’re alone.


***


And for you and me, I have this, my dearest.

As dainty as a pipit –– a hankering –– for an eternity
The moment –– stretches more – and seems a century
They carve it in souls –– and let them vaporize –
And float them in airs to their Shaper – divine
Mayhap He has a primmer bounty in store ––
For them –– a better ground to woolgather for

-B.H