The phrases “I am busy” and “I have been really busy lately” share a really strange relationship with my tongue, maybe the same which the two opposite poles of the same magnet share, strongly attracted, my tongue seems helpless sometimes and slips and says it, I am not sure for how many times I have uttered “I am busy” up till now in my whole life, but I am sure more than the number of Lady Gaga’s fans on this planet. Well, clichéd? Yet again! Okay verbose again, [=/] not good, makes things lilac.
Yes, I have been really busy –– watching movies, fasting, dozing off, and chewing bubble gums after Iftaar everyday, talking to friends (Doing nothing, if we talk seriously). And the solitude –– that used to separate me from this world, and used to help me with creating things –– things, which I was (or still am) passionate about –– is tumbling down. I am getting famous in my friends and yet I seem not happy. I am becoming just another teenager now. But, like a typical growing teenager, carrying on my favorite activities with the studies and at the same time experiencing the breakdown of my youthful innocence, going through exaggerated dramas and breaking or making of friendships isn’t really my thing.
My way of living my life was simple, away from controversies and politics, but I am feeling awkwardly weird these days. “I was never like that” is another phrase –– I have been using these days.
But…
Well, you know, the change, it is an unchangeable law. With every tick of the hand of the clock, I see a change in myself – in my behavior, my body, in my thoughts, and in the people around me –– my family. The way of the quest about life changes with time. My way of looking at things and views about them have changed, I’ve realized. Like the gurgling babies’ drools change and it someday transforms into monotonous voices or heavenly sounds or plain noises, and eventually they forget. Forget.
Forget. Forget. Forget.
That’s a heavy word, in every sense, some times beneficial, and sometimes, not. When we forget, doesn’t matter. But when they do, it does. [I guess I have distracted myself]
But the point is that, you can’t live like “those” people who inspired you. You are just what you are; you can be influenced, but you can’t be changed wholly. This all is happening. I am no more emo, there’s nothing between the lines I scribble these days. Or it’s just a phase. Let’s see.
I was never like that
Monday, August 30, 2010
by B.H.
Posted in
From:
Being me,
Emily Dickinson,
Experiences,
Good Times,
Stupid,
Thoughts
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18 comments:
Terrible ain't this? But maybe it's for the good. I'm experiencing the same thing...
Change is truly a variable constant of fate.
and forgetting, is indeed a powerful expression..Unwanted and well, unwelcomed at times, but still there. -.-
anyhow, i was never like that too!
You can't be changing, no! :o
But. At least one thing hasn't changed and I'm glad about that: your writing style :D I love it! :D
So you have been inspired .. NOT =p lol
Changes are irresistible like you said UNCHANGEABLE LAW , you can not help NOT to change or say EVOLVE to a newer you , evolve to deal with the new phase of life .. be the change temporary or permanent !
Who is telling you to be like THOSE PEOPLE ??? =)
*I am no more emo* Finally =p lol that's a good thing :)
@Maryam You have no idea! xD
@Shagufta! Variable constant =) Yeah! And I guess, we both were never like that =)
@Tazeen! I guess I can and have, a little! xD And thank you =P fat cat xD
@Princess! Yeah doh! Emily Dickinson? Don't you know =/ And what's up with your putting 'NOT' every where these days? =P And I want to be like them? Weren't they awesome? =D But I guess I can't be - wholly. And yay! I am no more emo, I gotta haircut! haha xD
I happen to be a follower so how can I forget the Emily Dickinson factor ;p LOL
With the NOT thing that is Not my fault , the not(s) were required here ;p
whoever *they* are I am sure are Awesome but why losing your true colors for them :)
Great great =D like I said before FINALLY no more emo ;p lol
a new hair cut ?! What ?!! when ?!! ;p lol haaha
Good for you :)
Haha Yes they are awesome =P And yeah i am not gonna lose my true colors for 'them'=D lol I had long hair - emo-type. No more now, foolish? I know I am xD
to change urself is rather task n to forget that is not possible
*And yeah i am not gonna lose my true colors for 'them'=D* sounds great :)
@Princess! =D
@Anum! Ahan =P and thanks for the comment! =)
Touba hai sirf hair-cut pe aisi post :P hahahaha . lol kidding! Thank God that I dint read ur emo entailed posts. Like this image of urs more :D and don't mention teenager fact again :-! :P
Hahahah lol and yeah! Emo entailed posts were really boring/awkward =D I'm glad you liked! And yeah I know, how painful it is to see teenagers when you've recently fallen off the teenager's bandwagon. =P Kidding kidding! =P
I hope its not a phase.
I agree that you can't be like them but get inspired.
Nice post, should have been more optimistic.
PS. I need distraction. Any idea?
Yeah, you should divert your attention towards constructive things i.e. studies, art, drawings, sports, and make less attachments with people. that must heal if you really want to... try.
And Thankyou for the praise Salman. =)
I liked one idea of these. Thanks. Work Started.
I am glad, good luck! =)
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